Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Episode 28

I haven't posted anything for a while because I have been treating myself to a days' long pity-party.

I made a huge mistake at the beginning of the summer. I decided that I was doing so much exercise and feeling so good from the endorphins that the exercise produced, that I could cut back on my anti-depression medication. By mid-August I was completely off them and feeling pretty good. However, I started bingeing again in a big way - almost always at night and always in secret.

It finally dawned on me, that while the exercise was lifting the depression, it wasn't doing anything for the underlying anxiety. Anxiety is what makes me binge - on bad carbohydrates that provide the seretonin boost that make my brain quiet and make me feel better - which is exactly what the anti-depressants do. DUHHHHH. I'm back on them.

I expect it to take a month to six weeks to start feeling the full effects of the medication, but I'm already noticing subtle differences.

I've never given up on exercise, and I'll never give up on finding the right balance for me where food is concerned. Bless my sister for opening my eyes to the fact that I never allow myself to actually 'enjoy' anything I eat. It's never too late to learn and so I'm starting a new page in life and on we go.

1 comment:

  1. Lybbe: Hope you're feeling better and I'm looking forward to your next podcast .... soon???